Butt-hurt is a phrase used in the military to describe someone who experiences an extreme emotional overreaction to a relatively mundane event. It's also an insult, since being told that you're butthurt is basically the same as being told that you're acting like a whiny little girl and you need to grow some balls and be a man.

Let me share with you the reason I felt suddenly compelled to share this word with you all: This weekend I was driving about on business here on Camp Lejeune, when I happened upon a good samaritan. You know... someone who drives exactly the posted speed limit, whereas 85% of the country (including myself) habitually drive 5 mph over the limit. 10% actually drive 10mph above it or more, making them actual no-shit speeders... the remaining 5% are the said good samaritans. These are estimates of course based on what I've seen with my own eyes in every state I've ever driven in, which accounts for about a quarter of the country.

ANYWAY, we were on a one-lane road and so I waited for a passing zone and moved to pass him. As I did this, some oncoming traffic appeared, coming around the next bend, and I had to make a choice - slow down and fall back in behind him to subsequently wait for the next opportunity to get around his slow ass, or gun it and seize the window ahead of me. There was plenty of time to make it, I just had to pick up a little speed.

Now, some of you are aware that I recently purchased a 2002 Corvette, and this is the vehicle I was driving at the time... this being one of the first times I really gave it some juice, I was not surprisingly rewarded with more than I had expected. I was doing about 75 when I passed him and pulled back into my own lane, and I hadn't intended to accelerate over 70 (no more than that would have been needed). After that I slowed back down to my normal 5-over and went on my merry way.

Well, the guy followed me all the way to my destination so that he could give me an earful about blowing by him when he was doing the speed limit ("If I'm doing the speed limit and you blow by me like that, what does that make you? A speeder!"). And I thought to myself "Ok, maybe this guy's just having a bad day or something, and besides that I did pass him pretty fast..." so I smiled and nodded and went on my way. No big deal.

Well, I come to work this morning and learn that he was a 1st Sgt, and that he called my SSgt. I explained to my SSgt that I had simply accelerated to make the window before I had a head-on collision with oncoming traffic, and openly admitted that I habitually drive 5 mph over the limit (I have no problem admitting that, since odds are extremely good that whoever I'm admitting it to does the same thing). He told me to use my head when I'm driving on base, and that I should have realized whoever I pass while I'm on Camp Lejeune is probably another Marine and quite possibly some high-and-mighty senior enlisted that's going to chase me down and give me an earful, then call my command... like this guy. Aye, SSgt. And back to work, still, no big deal.

Later, I encountered my own company 1st Sgt at the PX. I greeted him and his response was "You need to watch it with that car." I thought to myself "Ok, they're both 1st Sgt's, they're probably drinking buddies and talk to each other all the time, it's not like he went above my immediate command just to be a dick..." Aye, 1st Sgt. And back to work... a little weird, but still no big deal.

A few minutes ago the Battalion Sergeant Major knocked on my door and said "I heard you were doing a little speeding this weekend. If you're not careful you're going to lose your keys."

NOW I'm flabbergasted.

Following me to my destination = normal for a senior enlisted, they're particularly strict about following the rules to the letter.

Notifying my immediate command = also normal if he's upset enough with me or thinks he didn't get through to me himself.

Notifying my higher command = weird, but they're peers so it kinda makes sense, maybe it just came up in casual conversation or something.

Notifying the BATTALION SERGEANT MAJOR = Ok, now THAT is just butt-hurt. I only drive 5 miles over, that's nothing. Statistically, the odds are good that the SgtMaj himself does the same thing, probably the CO as well. I sped up like that to avoid on-coming traffic, that doesn't make me a speed-demon with no regard for the law. Down here at the Sergeant level, otherwise known as "where the rubber meets the road" or "where shit gets done", bringing such an insignificant issue so high up the chain of command is what's called a "bitch move". Thankfully this clown isn't my own 1st Sgt, I get really perturbed when something happens to make me lose respect for any of my own leaders.

Thanks for listening to me bitch.

EDIT: One of the comments reminded me of this story: I read in the news a few years ago about a guy who was doing the speed limit on the highway, and he was in the middle lane. Now, practically every other car on the road was doing 5-10 mph over the limit, and they were regularly passing him on both sides. This guy was of the mindset that he was the one and only guy who was in the right, obeying the law, and everyone else were speeding assholes and/or idiots that deserved to be pulled over.

Well, apparently a truck got stuck behind this guy and was waiting for quite some time for a chance to pass him, but all the cars behind him kept passing on both sides and by the time they were gone more had arrived. Finally he got an opening, but it was on the right side... having grown impatient, he took it anyway. A cop saw him, pulled him over and ticketed him. After he went on his way, he again caught up to the same guy... this time he took down the guy's license plate number.

Ready for this? That trucker's company sued the guy, for obstructing the flow of traffic and creating a road hazard. And they WON, to the tune of $10,000 or something absurd like that. The guy was doing the speed limit, the TRUCKER was speeding, AND cut him off AND got a ticket for that... and a court decided that HE was at fault because not conforming to the flow of traffic creates a road hazard since all the other cars have to drive around you, and the trucker was forced to improvise and adapt to avoid making it worse.

Now, a bit of math: The fine for speeding in NC is 10 dollars per mph over the posted limit. So... $50 fine, or $10,000 lawsuit? Seems like a pretty easy choice to me!