Dear Germany,

After I told my wife about my previous letter to in which I invited you to invade Australia, she asked me to add a few more simple requests.

Pretzels and bread.  My wife and I agree that while hese staples are available worldwide, the best are German.  So, she asked that should you invade Australia, could  you please bring a few of your wonderful  bakers with you.

Also, she stressed the importance of the fact that your great public transport system runs on time more than any other nation on the planet.  We suggest that when you do invade Australia, you could put a ositive spin on it with a simple advertising campaign along the lines of "We're here.  We're German and your trains and buses will now run on time!".

I have one more suggestion.  Australians love their beer and we actually manage to produce some prettty good brews, but again, the best in the world is certainly German.  When you ship over those bakers, if you could include in their ranks a few brewers as well, that'd be great.

Sincerely,

Bullseyerock