I WAS SITTING INFRONT OF THE TV ON MY LA-Z-BOY FORKLIFT HAVING A SNACK WHEN......HE WALKED INTO THE ROOM.  HIS FACE ALL JAGED, HIS EYES RED WITH PASSION;  HE LOOKED AT ME LIKE NO OTHER MAN HAS LOOKED AT ME BEFORE.  SUDDENLY, I FELT A STIRRING IN MY LOINS  I HADN'T FELT SINCE DORITOS CAME OUT WITH SWEET CHILLI HEAT. HE TOOK ONE LOOK AT ME, AND RIPPED OFF HIS PANTS AND POWER PUFF GIRLS BRIEFS. "TAKE ME NOW YOU 492LB LOVE BEAST!" HE MOANED.  THAT'S WHEN MY FACE ROSE FROM MY FAMILY SIZED KFC BUCKET, AND WITH POPCORN CHICKEN ON MY BREATH I SAID "LETS DO THIS!"  I TORE OFF MY HEFTY BAG UNDIES AND FLEW THROUGH THE AIR LIKE A FLESH COLOURED GOOD-YEAR BLIMP AND LANDED ON HIS SEXY PASTY BODY!  I TELL YOU IT WAS THE GREATEST 47 SECONDS OF MY LIFE!  AS WE LAY BESIDE EACHOTHER ON THE FLOOR, HE SMOKED A CIGARETTE WHILE I SMOKED A HAM.  HE SAID HE'D BE PARALYZED FROM THE WAIST DOWN FOR LIFE NOW, BUT IT WAS WELL WORTH THE ORGASM. I'VE NEVER FELT LIKE SUCH A MAN IN MY LIFE