SO THE OTHER DAY I WAS GETTING THE WORD "MODEST" TATTOOED ABOVE MY ABS WHICH ARE NUMBERED 1-6 WHEN I GET A CALL FROM GUINESS BOOK OF WORLD RECORDS TELLING ME THAT I AM THE STRONGEST MAN IN THE WORLD AND THEY WANT ME TO COME TO MUMBAI TO ACCEPT THE TROPHY, SO I INSTANTLY TELL HIM TO SHUT THE FUCK UP AND SLAM THE PHONE INTO THE GROUND SHATTERING IT INTO 1000 PIECES, THEN I HOP IN MY AUDI WITH A JAGUAR IN THE PASSANGER SEAT AND THE WINDOWS DOWN AND DO A BURNOUT WHILE SHOOTING MY GLOCK OUT THE SUNROOF AND PEEL OUT. I ARRIVE AT A SUPERMODELS HOUSE AND TELL HER TO GET IN CUZ I HAVE A 8 HOUR FLIGHT AND IVE NEVER GONE THAT LONG WITHOUT GETTING PUSSY SINCE I WAS 7 YEARS OLD AND STOPPED JACKING OFF. SO I OPEN THE PASSANGER DOOR AND MY JAGUAR LOOKS AT HER LIKE HE WANTS TO FUCK HER, SO I GET ON ALL FOURS AND ROAR AT IT AND IT TAKE A SWIPE AT ME, SO INSTANTLY MAUL ITS NECK AND SUFFOCATE IT BECAUSE IT GOT COCKY AS FUCK AND FORGOT WHO THE REAL ALPHA MALE IN THE PRIDE IS. THE SUPERMODEL AND ME GET TO THE AIRPORT AND WE GO TO THE FRONT COUNTER AND SHE ASKS ME HOW MANY TICKETS, SO I PULL UP MY SHIRT AND FLASH HER MY ABS AND SHE INSTANTLY REMEMBERS WHO I AM BECAUSE NO ONE FORGETS THIS RIPPED TO FUCK BODY AND SHE CALLS FOR AIRFORCE ONE JETS TO PICK ME UP, SO THE JET ARRIVES AND WE GET IN AND I GOT RESPECT BECAUSE OF MY BODY AND AFTER 6 HOURS WE GET TO MUMBAI AND MY BITCH STARTS PUTTING HER PARACHUTE ON, SO I GET PISSED AS FUCK SHES SUCH A PUSSY AND I PUSH HER OUT THE HATCH AND SHE DEPLOYS HER PARACHUTE, SO I GET PISSED AS FUCK CUZ THATS DISRESPECT AND I JUMP OUT WITH NO PARACHUTE, DIVE TOWARDS HER, GRAB HER PARACHUTE CABLE AND GRATE IT ON MY ABS AND THE CABLE SNAPS AS SHE PLUMMITS TO HER DEATH, SO I INSTANTLY RIP MY SHIRT OFF IN MID AIR AND INSTANTLY SLOW DOWN BECAUSE IM SO SHREDDED THAT MY BODY CAUSES DRAG. SO I LAND NEXT TO THE GUNIESS BULDING AND GO IN AND EVERYONE IS CHEERING FOR ME AND I GIVE THEM THE MIDDLE FINGER CUZ THATS NOT HOW YOU BREAK BREAD WITH A GOD, BUT IM HUMBLE AS FUCK AND A BUNCH OF LITTLE POOR KIDS RAN UP TO ME AND HUGGED MY TREE TRUNK LEGS SO I SMILED AND GAVE THEM THE TROPHY, BUT THEN I GOT PISSED AS FUCK CUZ THEY DIDNT EARN IT AND ALL THEY DO IS BE POOR, SO RUN OUTSIDE AND CALL IN AN AIRSTRIKE ON THE BUILDING AS IT BLOWS UP AND BODY PARTS OF CHILREN AND THEIR DICKS AND PUSSIES FLY EVERYWHERE AS I HOPE IN A CHOPPER AND FLY HOME LOOKING LIKE A CERTIFIED GANGSTER

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*YOU FAGGOTS CANT TALK NOW WITH A GUN IN YOUR MOUTH, CAN YOU PUNK? *YOU MUMLE