Why Parents Drink...
I call home from work this morning, as I do every morning, to see how my wife and kids are doing.
My four year old son answers the phone in a whisper, "Hello?"
"Hey buddy! How are you doing?" I ask.
He answers in whisper with a hint of a giggle, "Good daddy, really good!"
I start to wonder what's going on so I ask him, "Okay buddy, is mommy there?"
"Yes." he replies in his small voice.
"Can I speak to her?"
"Nope" was all I got from him.
Starting to wonder what the fuck is going on I ask him, "Is anyone else there?"
"Yes" he says, "A police man."
Hoping everything is okay, I ask, "Can daddy speak to the policeman?"
"Nope. He's busy." he whispers in reply.
"Busy doing what?"
"Talking to mommy and the fireman."
Now I'm shitting my pants, "What's that noise?"
"That's a helicopter!" he whispers in delight.
"Buddy, you really need to tell daddy what's going on!" I pleaded.
"The helicopter landed a search party daddy."
Alarmed and confused I try to keep my voice steady, "What are they searching for?"
Still whispering, he replied with a muffled giggle, "Me!"
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