Back in the day, people used to be killed in some horrific manor if they were suspected of being a witch. Today however, witches run free without any consequenes. I think this is wrong. Witches are starting to infect out society more than ever before and we are doing nothing about it. I can't remember the last time I've been to the mall and have not seen a witch. They like to hang out at malls because they can cast spells on many people there. The most common spell at the mall is the "McKingbell" spell. It's easy to recognize people under this spell, there are usually two obese parents pushing a stroller with at least 3 overweight children begging for toys or candy. A sure sign is if the oldest overweight son has pizza sauce smeared across his face and his shirt is too small with his stomach hanging out a little. It is highly recommended that you avoid people under the McKingbell spell.

      Another spell to avoid is the "Shuggy" spell. This spell usually affects African Americans. It causes them to gather in large numbers and hang out by Target or mall entrances. They are often loud and a bit frightening. The males rapidly lose weight causing their pants to fall. The weight is generally transfered to the females' gluteus maximus making them "bootylicious".

    The last spell is the "Dooshy" spell. People affected by this spell often look like douche bags. I would call them the vanilla ice's of the new millennium. They usually have gel in their hair and popped collars. There is little hope for these people. 

    So what can we do about this problem? Simple, when you see a witch (don't look directly at their eyes) tell them their outfit is pretty cool and ask where they got it so you can pick up something similar. If everyone does this we would be witch free by 2010. So do your part, make a difference, "kill" a witch.

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