Original ad:
FREE COUCH! i have a free plaid couch on the curb outside my house. the address is 39 ******* rd come and get it!
From Mike Anderson to **********@*******.org

Hey. I am tired of driving down ******* and seeing your ugly couch. It is ruining the neighborhood. What the hell were you thinking when you bought that? Nobody is going to want that thing! It better not be there when I drive past tomorrow.

From ************@gmail.com to Me

if you dont like it why dont u come and fuckin get it. tough shit if u dont like seeing it. its only been out there 1 day!

From Mike Anderson to ************@gmail.com

One day too many. I don't want your shitty couch. Maybe I would if I was a Scottish guy living in the 70's, but I'm not. That couch looks like what would happen if a parrot and a rhino fucked and had a freak baby, and then that baby grew up and then took a shit on your curb. Why don't you pay someone to haul that piece of shit away?

From ************@gmail.com to Me

fuck you buddy! tough shit. drive a different way

From Mike Anderson to ************@gmail.com

I like going that way because it is scenic. Well, at least it was until you put that pile of shit out there. If it is stil there tomorrow, I am going to come back during the night and cement it to your driveway.

From ************@gmail.com to Me

COME AND TRY IT MOTHERFUCKER ILL BE WAITING