One day, a third-grade teacher asks her students to correctly use the word "definitely" in a sentence.
Little Suzie says, "The sky is definitely blue."
The teacher says, "No, sometimes the sky is gray."
Little Billy says, "Grass is definitely green."
The teacher says, "No, sometimes grass is brown if you don't water it."
Then Little Johnny asks, "Teacher, can farts be lumpy?"
The teacher replies, "No."
To which Little Johnny says, "Then I definitely shit my pants."