3 mice are sitting at a bar in a pretty rough neighborhood late at night trying to impress each other about how tough they are. The 1st mouse orders a scotch, gulps it down and slams the glass on the bar. He turns to the second mouse and says, "When I see a mousetrap, I lie on my back and set it off with my foot. When the bar comes down, I catch it in my teeth, bench press it 20 times to work up an appetite, and then make off with the cheese."
The 2nd mouse orders two shots of bourbon, slams them down and nearly breaks the glasses on the bar. He turns to the first mouse and replies, "Yeah, well, when I see rat poison, I collect as much as I can, take it home, grind it into a powder, and add it to my coffee each morning so I can get a good buzz going for the rest of the day."
The 1st mouse and the 2nd mouse then turn to the 3rd mouse. The 3rd mouse lets out a long sigh and says to the first two, "I don't have time for this bullshit. I gotta go home and screw the cat."