Artery: The study of paintings.

Benign: What you be after you be eight.

Bacteria: Back door to cafeteria.

Barium: What doctors do when patients die.

Cesarean Section: A neighborhood in Rome.

Cat Scan: Searching for Kitty

Cauterize: Made eye contact with her.

Coma: A punctuation mark.

Dilate: To live long.

Enema: Not a friend.

Fester: Quicker than someone else.

Fibula: A small lie.

Hangnail: What you hang your coat on.

Impotent: Distinguished, well known.

Labor Pain: Getting hurt at work.

Medical Staff: A Doctor's cane.

Morbid: A higher offer than I bid.

Nitrates: Cheaper than day rates.

Node: I knew it.

Pelvis: Second cousin to Elvis.

Post Operative: A letter carrier.

Rectum: Darn near killed him.

Seizure: Roman emperor.

Tablet: A small table.

Tumor: More than one.

Urine: Opposite of you're out

Varicose: Near by