Not only do I buy the bootleg brands, but I will complain about the quality of the product. For instance, I bought a bootleg Rolex and I wrote them a letter of complaint.

Dear Bolex,

This is not the quality I've come to expect from Bolex timepieces. Usually when I purchase a Bolex it works flawlessly for 6 days. But this watch that I purchased on Canal Street (literally, ON Canal Street) stopped working after just 2 days. I am very upset because this was a gift to my girlfriend... for our anniversary.

Your inferior product caused her to break up with me. Sure she says she broke up with me because I slept with her mother... but you guys didn't help the situation.

So I am requesting a full refund of my 2 dollars and 25 cents.