Three bums are talking one evening, when the first says, “You should have been with me last night. I was behind the new Burger King, looked in the dumpster and found a half-eaten Whopper and half a Sprite. I had myself a feast!”

The second one says, “You should have been with me last night. I was behind the liquor store, and found a case of broken whiskey bottles in the Dumpster. I got a good drink!”

The third one says, “You should have been with me last night. I was walking down the railroad tracks, ran into a woman, went off into the woods and had sex for hours!”

Excitedly, the first one asks, “So, did you get any head?”

The third one says, “Nah, never could find her head.”